Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Starting Back Up

it’s been a while since i’ve done a blog. i mean the last one i did was for a class, not that that is bad or anything but you can tell the difference in one that is mandatory and one that is from the heart. so the blogs to come will be different. they won’t look neat and orderly. there might not even be perfect punctuation. i’m just using this as a means of getting things off my chest. something i can go back to later and look back on to see where i was at this crucial time in my life.
i’m in college now. i’m a junior which is crazy! it doesn’t feel like it at all. i’m gonna be a speech comm major with a minor in religion. i figure it will help me with public speaking. it would be cool to be a speaker at different youth events. i feel that its crucial to reach out to these young adults not just because thats what i am now, but because that is where the movement will start. adults are to comfortable and set in their ways (not all adults but the majority yes). the youth however aren’t therefore they have the ability to change. what else about me? i have a brother that proves God exists and cares everyday. i am single. which is interesting cuz i havent been for that long. i dated a girl for almost a year and a half. she was great! she truly was and she lived for God. but we started growing apart over the summer and different things built up until finally i couldn’t stand it when she did certain things. lack of communication can kill a relationship. i’m still in the awkward stage when i am around her. we both have the same friends. things are different now and i haven’t adjusted. on top of that i had started to talk to another girl almost immediately after we broke up. i wasn’t looking for a g/f this girl just kinda happened. we hung out and talked but that was it. nothing more. but about 5 days ago i felt like God was telling me not to date anyone for the time being. you see when i date someone i give them all of my attention i push everything else to the side i.e. God, friends, family, school. i know its not the healthiest thing but thats what i have done in the past. the Lord pointed that out to me through different friends and i realized i was already doing that with this new girl. so i told her we can only be friends maybe later more but not for the time being. i felt bad saying that cuz i was yanking the rug out from under her but at the same time i didn’t cuz i was obeying God.
I screw up all the time and yet i don’t understand how God can still love me. He truly is great! i’ve been reading through Isaiah over the past year it feels like. (i don’t have daily devotionals) but half way thru it i was getting tired of everything saying how great and magnificent and merciful and loving is the LORD. just chapter after chapter was saying the same thing then i realized how true it is. what else should we write about other than the fact that our God, the LORD Almighty is number 1! there is no one or anything better than Him. he deserves all the praise. His grace is beyond explanation. His love is beyond comparison. He loves us, He loves me because He is so great even though we don’t deserve it.
i hope this helps you if your reading it. i’m doing this to help myself but i pray that God uses it to help you. to Him be the glory forever and ever.
-   Josh

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